Trust Your Body
A friend asked me why he was feeling so annoyed by everything and just wanted to be left alone. This got me thinking about how we generally don't pay recognition to what our body is telling us. Instead, we listen to our mind, which isn't always the best par for the course. I've become pretty good at realising when I'm not ok, either physically or mentally. This is partly due to having chronic illnesses that you have to pay attention to otherwise serious complications arise but It's also down to how inquisitive I am as a person. I like to research things I don't know about and look into why things work the way they do, or at least how other people perceive the ways of the human psyche, the universe and anything beyond our comprehension. There are things that I know affect me which feel beyond my control because I side stepped them at the time or didn't know how to deal with it so I filed it away and now it's at a point where I realise I need a professional to help me do some admin and sort through it. But in general, I like to think I have a good handle on who I am and how I work.
The thing is, with the problems my friend described and with what I have experienced myself, it's that we tend to ignore what's right there in front of us and we continue doing what we've been doing the entire time, hoping it will just fix itself. It won't. This is something you have to start working on, just like going to the gym but for your mental health. It takes time, mental healing takes time and effort that some days you won't want to put in. That's ok, you don't have to be on top form every single day. For once, try to ignore the societal culture of feeling guilty for taking a day off. Just try not to make a habit out of it because, like muscles, the growth will whither and weaken. The next time you feel amazing, you're having the time of your life, notice your environment. What are you doing? Who are you with? How were you feeling before this? These are all factors that you can recognise and then control. You could be in a room full of people and feel like the only person there. In contrast, you could be with five people and feel like the richest person in the world. Those are the people you should put your energy into. Those are whom will reciprocate that energy and enrich your life. The same goes for the mundane in your daily routine. Ok, granted right now daily routine is a bit askew what with the global pandemic but still, it applies. The next time you find yourself sat on the tube, cycling, on the bus, driving, whatever, and you're on autopilot or just bored of the same commute, pay attention to it. Actively think about it and then change it. The next day, take a different route, cycle the long way or take a different road that takes the same amount of time. If it takes ten minutes extra, wake up ten minutes earlier to do it. I promise you it will make a difference.
More often than not, stagnancy is the reason for feeling drained or low. If you're doing the same thing, day in, day out, you're going to get bored. It's inevitable. Start small, switch up your alarm, add a topping to your cereal, maybe a syrup in your coffee, treat yourself! Then, work your way up. You'll be amazed at how much it can change your mood.
On the other side of this, the whole listening to the mind thing, I don't know about you but sometimes there's a voice in my head that sucks the life out of me. It likes to undermine my decisions, force thoughts about situations I've either been in or am about to be in, keeps me awake at night thinking about things I have no business thinking about at 3am. There is a theory I read, and enjoyed, that claims this voice isn't yours. It's a separate entity within your subconscious that feeds off of negativity and insecurity. The more you feed it, the stronger it gets. The only way to stop this is to recognise it as such, acknowledge what it's saying and then dismiss it. The less you feed it, the less power it will have over you. You can either buy into this fully or you can do what I did and take it as a metaphor but put it into practice. Every time I have a debilitating thought, I thank the voice for its input and then politely tell it to fuck off. At first it took a while for me to fully believe in what I was telling it but after doing it every single time, I eventually realised I was empowering myself to overcome my inner demons. Yes, it sounds hokey but in a world where people believe Trump is a good person, 5G is going to cause an apocalypse and CoVid is a cover up for paedophilia, why not believe in something positive for a change.
In the end, the advice I gave my friend was this: take note of who you're with when you feel your best. Take note of what you're doing when you feel your lows and stop doing it. Change your behaviours and eventually your behaviours will change you. It's not a guaranteed science but it worked for me and it could work for you. Why not try to work on yourself mentally as well as physically? Also, asking for help from anyone, be it a friend, a colleague or a professional is never showing weakness. It's realising you want to do something about what is impacting you negatively and that is strength and personal growth that you should be proud of.
So remember kids, keep pushing forward, don't always focus on staying strong, (it's exhausting), and keep an eye on what makes you happy x